Reprieve!

Vance and Barbi came down Thursday night to be with me for the next morning's chemo treatment. I was psyching myself out, telling myself, "It's only for 5 hours. Just five hours out of your life to help save your life." (My sister's words echoed in my brain: "Do you have anything better to do with your life other than to save it?") Vance and Barbi were there, I had the support...I was ready.

My doctor came in. She told me that with these drugs, I had gone through 6 cycles. "I can probably push it with one more, but I really don't want to do that." The drugs affect the heart, could cause heart failure. She said she wanted to try something different. I would have to have a heart scan to determine the correct dosage, but that I could go on a chemo pill, instead of using the intravenous method. She told me to drink 2 ounces of Aloe Vera juice, and to eat a half can of asperagus with the juice a day. She wanted me to do Yoga. She wanted to see me in 5 weeks. She said she believed in miracles, the power of the mind. She told me; "I don't want you to think about the cancer right now. I want you to start living your life as normally as you can." She asked about how going back to work was working for me. I told her that it had done wonders for me (mentally and emotionally, it was the best thing I could have done for myself to get me out of depression. The walls had started closing in and I needed to break out of the darkness that threatened to eat me alive.) I asked her, "So, no chemo today?" She shook her head. I about cried right then. I wrote down her instructions, looked up from my notebook and said, "We're going to beat this, aren't we, Doc?" She smiled and nodded. "We're going to beat this." We hugged.

The joy of sharing that moment with my brother and sister-in-love was wonderful! I walked out of there, tears, smiles...joy! Barbi said it was like Christmas. Vance said, "It IS like Christmas." We went to Starbucks, Best Buy to pick up a Magick Bullet set, went to visit my friend Carmen at her work to give the news to her face-to-face. I called Marla, went home called all I could think of. Vance needed to go home, Barbi said she would stay with me this weekend, even though without the chemo treatment there was no need, but I really am glad she stayed, we've had such a great day today. Starting up this blog, sharing, talking, bonding! It's been a joy to have her here. Tomorrow we go food shopping to keep me on 'staying' healthy. I am of the belief that I am healed, whole and complete...just waiting for my body to catch up to my spirit. :)
Life is good!